December 8, 2005

  • Internet Quiz Time.

    Internet Quiz Time

    It is known throughout the entire universe that the Internet is a vast heap of garbage with like phone lines and cables shooting out of it like tentacles. One of the giant cables leads back to the source (called The World Wide Web Consortium) which is run by teenage girls with blogging sites. What's a blog you ask? Think of a regular journal but with poop stains all over it. The stains are crusting up the pages and some of it is discolored. In fact, there are different spatters of feces from several disgusting animals. Animals like horseshoe crabs, monkeys, and Carrot Top.

    The point of all this is to point out the point of what my point is being. Albeit points will point out other points. Albeit is a word that nobody should use - EVER. It's so dumb and makes you sound like a jackass.

    "Hey Gary, we will have those quarterly reports by Friday ready to go albeit it sucks."
    "Albeit my cock with a giant hook and you can drink the blood dripping from it."

    Anyway, the advanced graphic I created with my crazy mad skillz isn't there for nothing. I will go about to create an Internet quiz so I can be cool like all the kids. The reason so many kids write Internet quizzes and people devote their lives to compiling them all together into vast websites is because they need to fill a void. This void is where originality used to be and we all know that writing on the Internet is a constant struggle for originality. I mean, right now there are thousands of other idiots writing in similar situations on their geocities.com style websites ripping me off and I don't even know it! What's up with these jerks? What are they? Stupid jerks? I'm pretty sure the FBI is reading this right now because it's so awesome that they need to keep it under a watchful eye. Whatever.

    This quiz could work anywhere outside of the Internet. You should probably print this out and leave it in the bathroom stall at your local police department or whatever health clinic you're currently staying at with Internet access.

    • What is your name?
    • What is your REAL name?
    • Where do you live?
    • If you had a choice between getting rid of your privates or going blind, which would you choose?
    • Don't you just hate pompous assholes who buy $1.00 items with a 20 dollar bill?
    • To top it all off, these jerks come in the next day and ask how much it is - like it matters anyway when you're paying for it with a 20 dollar bill! I mean, what's up with that?
    • I _____ like to _____ in your _____ all _____ and _____ with _____.
    • If you're so smart, how come you're reading this?
    • Seriously, people are dumb for making these. It's kind of funny that I'm saying that while making one. Actually, it's not funny at all. When someone says "it's kind of funny" I expect something to be funny. Instead I'm always disappointed with boring information that I don't care about. Shutup already! I mean, what's your big deal?
    • BILL COSBY?
    • COMEDY STYLE SENTENCES?
    • What's going on here?
    • Whoa, did you hear that one story where some bi-polar guy ran out of an airplane screaming that he had a bomb and then got shot a million times as he was running out of the plane? That was awesome. He probably had like a million bullet wounds and his spine looks like swiss cheese I bet.
    • Why is Nickleback still around?
    • Who listens to Nickleback?
    • What's the deal with Nickleback?
    • Can somebody stop Nickleback already?
    • Hey Kenny, stop _____ in my _____! It's dumb!
    • Because if you take this quiz you're a communist.

    I think that has gone on for long enough. I guess I should probably be a teacher or something because I give out such great quizzes. Let me go apply for a job at Harvard. Yep, I'm in. Just like when I went for the job at the dictionary awhile back. It's just that simple. I don't see why you couldn't get in. OH WAIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE ELITE SCUM OF THE EARTH LIKE THE LEADER OF SCUM THE SCUM HITLER. Goodbye.

    - Awful Xanga of the Week

    ONLYarShWeeEE (thanks Featured Content) - Hey kids! She's studying to be a MODEL and a SINGER! Oh man, she'd better hit them books! What does she look like? Well, fine citizen, you can just look at one of many (thousands maybe) pictures she posted of herself across the site! It's like looking at her in 3D as some of them are the same only her head is tilted slightly to the left three degrees or she's making another "koOkY" face! WHAT WILL SHE THINK OF NEXT? A RIGHT CLICK SCRIPT OR PRODUCTIONZ COMPANY?! Tune in next week for the final episode.

Comments (11)

  • More like a giant elb-NO! ...ass.

    first comment, YAY!!!

    -ToK

  • Hopefully the last! Seriously, you smell like truck tires.

  • A girl like that is usually only good for one thing.

    Making pancakes for me.

  • What is your name? Gandor the Destroyer of Elves

    What is your REAL name? Gandor the Destroyer of Elves Jr.

    Where do you live? At home

    If you had a choice between getting rid of your privates or going blind, which would you choose? Privates

    Don't you just hate pompous assholes who buy $1.00 items with a 20 dollar bill? I hate all paper money; debit is teh winz

    To top it all off, these jerks come in the next day and ask how much it is - like it matters anyway when you're paying for it with a 20 dollar bill! I mean, what's up with that? They're jerks.

    I _____ like to _____ in your _____ all _____ and _____ with _____. I would like to poo in your mouth all day and night with my anus.

    If you're so smart, how come you're reading this? I AM SMART. S-M-R-T

    Seriously, people are dumb for making these. It's kind of funny that I'm saying that while making one. Actually, it's not funny at all. When someone says "it's kind of funny" I expect something to be funny. Instead I'm always disappointed with boring information that I don't care about. Shutup already! I mean, what's your big deal? Eat it.

    BILL COSBY? Bill Cosby.

    COMEDY STYLE SENTENCES? I AM TEH FUNNY.

    What's going on here? Nerdery.

    Whoa, did you hear that one story where some bi-polar guy ran out of an airplane screaming that he had a bomb and then got shot a million times as he was running out of the plane? That was awesome. He probably had like a million bullet wounds and his spine looks like swiss cheese I bet. Probably.

    Why is Nickleback still around? For the same reason we have still have American Idol.

    Who listens to Nickleback? Probably you.

    What's the deal with Nickleback? More like "what's the deal with Ovaltine?"
    -
    Can somebody stop Nickleback already? They cannot be destroyed by conventional weapons, sadly...

    Hey Kenny, stop _____ in my _____! It's dumb! Hey Kenny, stop being in my internet! It's dumb!

    Because if you take this quiz you're a communist. Long live Tito.

  • yeah going blind would be where its at when you never use you penis.^^

  • she thinks shes ugly. and boy is she right!

    wait, i dont get her name. Her name is Arshwee? That's no name for a model. That's a name for a fat kid.

    A fat kid that jiggles when he brushes his teeth. Take that, fat kid.

  • You said it best when you said "You can't stop the internet." Nothing could be more true.

  • You've been TAGG'D.

    See my site for more details.

  • hey friend.  It's good to see you're still at it. wup, I gotta go...the Colbert Report is on. 

    PS. I hope Nickelback gets ass-raped by guerillas

  • Come Kenneth, and see your possible afterlife while you still have the opportunity to change it.

  • Oh my god. Shes way  too fat to be a model.

    jkjkjkjjkjkjkjkjkj

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